Most of us spend a significant amount of time planning what presents to give to our friends and loved ones. We spend a lot less effort on considering our own wishes and desires. If someone asks what we would like for Christmas, many of us mumble “oh, I don’t need anything”. It’s true enough. You may not need anything, but don’t you, too, deserve a treat? And if you don’t know (and let others know) what you would truly like, is it any wonder if you end up with a bunch of gifts you couldn’t care less about (remember that purple vase your sister-in-law got you last year?)?

If you are one of the few who already have a clear wishlist you might as well skip this post. However, if you still have no clue what to wish for, read on.  Of course I do not know what you would like for Christmas, but I will share some ideas that might help you figure it out for yourself. 

1. Learn something new

There is little more stimulating than a new interest. It not only leads to new skills, but also helps you to discover a whole new world and make new friends. You are never too old to learn a new skill or gain fresh knowledge. Have you always wanted to learn how to ski, dance or paint with water-colors? Now is a good time to start. Find a new interest. Figure out what resources, lessons, or materials you need for it. There is sure to be something affordable for anybody’s pockets.

Maybe it is time to turn into an artist

You don’t have to start big. If getting a full membership at the golf club is too expensive consider getting a book, taking a class etc. No matter whether it is playing the violin or throwing some pottery, now is your chance to get started.

2. Treat yourself to some real luxury

Everyone should feel like a queen (or a king) sometimes. Is there something you have always dreamed of owning? Now is the time for it.

Okay, okay, maybe right now that trip around the world on an ocean liner is out. And maybe even the beautiful cashmere sweater is more than your husband can afford at the moment. Never mind. Start small. Think about what it is that you crave and get at least a small taste of it now (and maybe invest in a lottery ticket for the future). If you can not afford the sumptuous cashmere sweater maybe there is a much less expensive pair of cashmere gloves with your name on it somewhere. And even if you can’t afford the smart designer suit there might be a far thriftier item (a scarf or something similar) by the same designer available.

Yes, it might seem silly to pay the same for a small scarf as you would for a whole outfit at your local discount store. But if that scarf gives you the feeling of pampered indulgence and makes you feel like a queen, it might well be worth it.

3.  Choose something that will give you daily pleasure

A luxurious vacation is great, but there is also something to be said for smaller things that give you daily pleasure. Any item that makes you feel loved, pampered or priviledged will do. This could be a beautiful set of crockery or a pair of cozy pajamas. Is there something in your home that irritates you regularly because it feels scratchy, looks junky, or doesn’t work properly? Maybe now is the chance to replace it with something that will improve your day!

4. Fulfill a childhood dream

We never outgrow our childhood. Is there something you always wanted to do but never got to experience because it was too “silly” or too expensive? Maybe now you can go for it. Often we feel too old or just forget but why not fulfill your wishes? Have you always wanted to fly a kite? There are some great models available now. Have you always dreamed of buying every imaginable kind of jelly bean at the local candy store? Why not do that now?

Who wouldn't love to try every kind?

Often, fulfilling one of these childhood dreams is neither difficult nor very expensive. It just never occurs to us. But if you try to remember, maybe one of these unfulfilled longings will come back to you. If you are one of the lucky ones who pretty much own every gadget imaginable anyway, this might be a chance for a special indulgence after all.

The air is starting to feel like fall, and that means it is about time to start our apple projects again. For some reason, apples just provide many great project opportunities. The first thing we did for our apple season project this year was to take a trip to the local grocery store. There we chose one apple each of every different variety offered. We ended up with eight different kinds.

.

The best apple of all!

Once the taste test was complete, we sat there with eight partly eaten apples. Because Benjamin is the only one of us who truly loves apples (and even he can’t eat eight at once), I took four of them to make apple crumble. It turned out delicious. Apple crumble is definitely one of my all time favorite desserts, and so easy to make:

1. Cut four midsized apples into pieces and put in a casserole dish.
2. Mix 1 cup flour, 2/3 cups sugar, 1/2 cup butter and some cinammon until you have a crumbly mass. Pour on top of the apples.
3. Bake at 180° for about 30 minutes.
4. Enjoy!

Tasty, tasty

While the apple crumble was baking, we sat down and read one of our favorite apple-themed books: Johnny Appleseed. I really enjoy the colors and the style of the pictures in this book. I enjoy quilting and like the quilt patterns used for borders. The kids love to look at the detailed pictures which give lots of opportunities for discussions and questions. What I like most about the book though is the way Johnny Appleseed is portrayed: as a gentle man who loves nature, people, and God (and apples of course). Somehow, the rhymed text really works for me. This is definitely a book I - and the boys - would recommend.

Well, we have just returned from our trip. After taking two longer vacations last year, there was just no way that we could take a real holiday this year. However, our former neighbors have since relocated to a small town close to the mountains and invited us to come for a visit. We actually had visited them two years ago but had skipped last year as they were expecting a new baby.
I was a bit anxious about the trip. My six-year old and their son are almost the same age. When we were still neighbors, the kids played together pretty much daily. However, two years are a long time and I was a bit worried that they would no longer get along. I needn’t have worried about that. They got along great. Unfortunately, I think Jonathan was so determined to get along with J. that it put a lot of stress on him. Let’s just say the boys behaviour was not what it should have been. Added to the stress of staying in an unfamiliar environment it made for quite a volatile time!

Getting ready for our train trip

We travelled there on the train and the journey, though a bit long, went fairly well. Actually, travelling with a six- and a three-year old is much better than with a four- and a one-year old. A new kids magazine kept Jonathan pretty busy, and Benny was happy enough munching cookies. By the end of the 4.5 hour trip the mood wasn’t quite as upbeat anymore, but finally getting there lifted everyone’s spirits.

A highlight of the trip was seeing our friends’ new baby (new to us that is as she is already almost a year old). She has bright blue eyes and coppery red hair. Benjamin was torn between enthusiasm and some fear as far as she was concerned. It was definitely quite an experience for him and since the visit he has spent quite a bit of time “playing baby”. We ended the day by grilling sausages over an open fire.

The next day, we visited the nearby lake. All the kids (but for the baby of course) enjoyed splashing in the water. However, Jonathan was rather shocked to find real life fish swimming in the water. You could tell he was only used to the pool so far. The lake also had empty mussels shells, and the older boys had a blast collecting those.

The boys at a small water mill.

Tuesday, we took the train to a small town from where we went on a very nice walk. There was a lot to see: a model of a small water mill, a barefoot path, an icy cold mountain stream to wade in, and a spectacular gorge with small waterfalls. The hike through the gorge was just barely manageable for a three-year old. Some of the steps/rocks/roots were quite high, but Benjamin was a real trooper about it. Afterwards, we had lunch. The boys weren’t too interested in their french fries after all the snacks they’d had, but luckily there was a playground at the restaurant. Thanks to that, the grown-ups got to finish their meal in peace for once. On the way back to the train station we stopped at a wading pool which the kids loved and at a very nice playground. All in all, a very successful excursion.

This being the third day, I had finally learned my lesson and made sure that the two older boys were separated a bit when we got back to the house. Giving Jonathan a bit of time to himself and letting him to some cutting/coloring really helped to keep the behaviour from escalating again (though I have to admit it still wasn’t great).

The next day we started pretty early in the morning on our return trip. Unfortunately, the trip was just as long as on the way there (wonder why it hadn’t shrunk in the meantime). Still, eventually we arrived back home.

It was a nice trip, but also quite exhausting. For some reason the boys really had a hard time keeping a check on their behaviour. I think for Jonathan it was mainly the excitement of seeing his friend again, and the desperate need to get along with him even if it meant constant compromise. I think next time I would make more of an effort to give everyone some alone-time.

I have already posted a number of times about buying gifts. A bit prematurely, you might think, in August. However, things are really gearing up for Christmas now. As I found out when I was doing some research about Black Friday. Nope, that is not a day of national grief. Instead, it has traditionally been the busiest shopping day of the year (at least as far as number of shoppers in the stores is concerned).
Black Friday, the day after Thanksgiving, will be November 28th this year. On that day, many of the large chains offer a number of outstanding deals and sales (I am talking about really good deals). However, the problem has always been that the ads do not come out until a day or two before Black Friday, which means you basically have no time to work out a shopping strategy. Strategy is essential (if you should decide to take advantage of this day that is) as many of the best deals are only available in very limited numbers. And, as you know, it is the early shopper that gets the Wii!
But fear not! A solution is at hand. It is our old friend, the world wide web, rushing to the rescue. There are a number of websites that publish Black Friday ads much earlier than they are available in print. As a matter of fact, the first of these ads for 2008 (for ACE hardware as it happens) is already up! Plenty of time to get your act together and stand in front of your chosen shopping destination with shopping list in hand at 5am (yep, you really have to be an early riser to take home the loot) on Black Friday.
The Black Friday websites also offer a variety of other features ranging from customized shopping lists over coupon codes to discussion boards. After checking out a handful of these sites I have decided on my personal favorites:

1. www.blackfriday.gottadeal.com
   • Website appears clean and professional
   • Lots of deals and coupons on offer
   • The discussion boards have a nice community feel
2. www.bfads.net
• Offers tips on shopping strategy
• Discussion forums
• Some interesting features (best/worst deals etc.)

Now remember, I chose these two websites as my favorites based solely on my personal impression. This early in the year, there aren’t enough Black Friday ads available to judge how up-to-date, correct, or extensive the websites really are.

Anyway, if you are thinking of hitting the stores on Black Friday, taking a look at one of these websites might be a good idea. And if even the idea of getting close to a store on that day gives you a rash, there is still a good reason why you should visit one of these websites: They also publish which of the Black Friday offers are available for online purchase - the ultimate solution to avoiding the shopping crowds during the holiday season.

If you are one of the lucky moms whose children are busy playing all day without any interference from you, I envy you. At our house, these times are few and far between. Generally, my kids require my help in organizing their activities. Now, with the boys’ preschool closed for three weeks, my entertainment skills are once again called to the fore.

We usually try to work on a project or two during vacation times. The purpose of these projects isn’t so much to learn things (although of course that is a nice side effect) but mostly just to keep them happily entertained. This summer, we have decided to do an Africa project, and today we finally got started.

We own several picture books with an African theme, and today we kicked off our project by reading Anansi the Spider. It’s an Ashanti tale about the famous trickster, spider Anansi, and his family. Anansi gets into trouble (or what would you call getting swallowed by a fish?) and his five sons, each of which has a special skill, rush to his rescue. With its clear design, bold colors and unusual style, it is quite a departure from the majority of books. The boys liked it okay, but weren’t truly excited by it. I think the style might have been a bit too different for their taste. However, for an introduction to our project it served quite well.

Then we did a fun craft activity for an “African” wallhanging.
The instructions are fairly simple:

1. Cut a piece of burlap into an appropriate size, making sure that you cut off any selvage edges.
2. Choose threads to pull out on the sides and create spaces where only vertical threads remain (Sorry, I know that isn’t the best explanation. But take a look at the picture below and you’ll know what I mean)
3. Then use various pieces of colored yarn to knot bunches of threads together in those places where you removed the horizontal threads
4. When you are happy with the look - or tired of tying knots - attach the cloth to a rod (we just used a twig the boys had dragged home) with tape and tie on a longer piece of yarn to hang it up with

Here is what it looks like:

The wallhanging Benjamin made with some help from me

I liked this craft project for several reasons:

• You don’t need a lot of expensive/hard-to-get materials
• It is really easy. Even little ones can do it (though they may need help with the knotting), while older children can complete it with minimal help. Ben pulled out the strings himself and chose which color yarn to use.
• It’s a great outlet for all those kids that have just learned how to tie knots and are now tying little pieces of string all over the house

I got the idea for this wallhanging from a great book we have, Global Art by MaryAnn F. Kohl. We have several books by this author, and I use them often with the boys. I am not too crazy about cookie-cutter crafts and really appreciate the emphasis on experimentation and enjoyment of the process instead of on the finished product. Ms. Kohl’s ideas really fit with my parenting philosophy.

Yesterday, when it was time for a read-aloud, Ben, my three year old, chose Little Red Riding Hood. We hadn’t looked at it for quite a while (I think it was hiding behind the Lego chest), so we were already in the middle of the story when I remembered why I didn’t much care for the book.

Don’t get me wrong: When I was little I liked Little Red Riding Hood. But as an adult I don’t quite get the morale of the story. The whole mess is Little Red Riding Hood’s fault for not listening to her mother and leaving the path, right? But doesn’t she meet the wolf on the path? He could gobble her up right there and then, couldn’t he? What was her mother thinking of, to let her walk alone through a forest infested with wolves? And why didn’t Grandma keep her door locked? She is certainly old enough to know better!

Questions over questions. But my real issue with our copy of the story is that it is a very watered down version. I know it is just my personal taste but if I am reading a fairy tale I want the real thing (wicked step-mothers and all). Now, first of all, everyone knows that Little Red Riding Hood wants to cheer Grandma up by bringing her wine and cake. In our book the basket holds bread, cheese, grapes, oranges and apples. I guess I understand the reason behind leaving out the wine (though a nice bottle of juice wouldn’t be a problem, would it?), but what is it with all these healthy foods instead of cake? Come on, it is a fairy tale, not a nutrition lesson. 

Too picky, you may say. Noone cares what is in the picnic basket anyway. But that’s just the beginning. Let’s just say in our story NOBODY gets eaten. Grandma is locked into the closet (why doesn’t she at least call out and warn her granddaughter, I wonder), and Little Red Riding Hood practises some sort of karate with her cape which causes the wolf to fall out the window. Even my three-year old wondered why the wolf couldn’t just come back in through the door. Luckily, the wolf isn’t that smart and runs away. In spite of that, Little Red Riding Hood has learned her lesson (not sure why though as she ends up the heroine for saving Grandma).

I know that many consider fairy tales too scary for little ones. As mother to two boys of the very sensitive, easily spooked variety I completely understand.  Our version of Little Red Riding Hood certainly doesn’t pose a problem there (actually, we have a copy of Lon Po Po which we never look at  as it is ”too scary”). And Little Red Riding Hood does save the day, thereby providing a pretty good role model. I should love the book.

But I can’t help but prefer the “real” version of the story. Which leaves me to wonder what to do with the book we have. Generally, I am not too happy when the boys want to play library, as this tends to shorten a book’s life-span considerably. But maybe next time I will just let them use our copy of Little Red Riding Hood for their pretend play.

What are your preferences? Do you prefer your stories traditional (with all the scary aspects) or would you rather have a nice, politically correct version?

Today is a dark, dreary and rainy day. Not what you would expect in mid-August. I guess we won’t go to the pool, to the playground or to that favorite of destinations - the ice-cream parlor - today.

But as a Christmas aficionado I have discovered a positive aspect to the grey sky and drizzle: It makes me get in the Christmas mood. We all know how much there is to be done to get Christmas organized properly, and of course, we also know how important it is to get started early (yadda, yadda, yadda). But let’s face it: It is kind of difficult to work on tree ornaments or plan your Christmas dinner if it is 95 degrees outside and the pool is calling. Possibly, this doesn’t bother those of you who live in sunny climes and for whom Christmas in the sunshine is a reality. But for the rest of us, it is hard to get in the Christmas spirit if the weather is decidedly “un-Christmasy”.

Well, let me tell you, today that shouldn’t be a problem at our house. If I didn’t know better, looking out the window would convince me that it is November. So, instead of complaining about the unseasonal weather we will try to seize the opportunity and get some of those “Christmas chores” crossed of our list.

I hope it rains on Sunday, hard. Pretty strange wish, you think? Let me explain.

For almost a week now, my son has been spending pretty much every waking minute in planning a watermelon party. I guess there was something like it on TV (a Winnie the Pooh show, I believe). Oh, the evils of television.

Actually, I am impressed by all the things he has already done in preparation. He has made various decorations (including a great banner with individual pictures of all the Winnie-the-Pooh characters), dozens of raffle tickets and trays for carrying the watermelons on. Now he is working on the prices for the raffle. He is actually copying a picture book we have and has already completed a number of pages in his painstaking kindergarten writing. From an educational perspective, this project is a dream. He is practising his letter recognition and handwriting, his numbers (for the raffle tickets), fine motor skills (all that drawing and cutting) and of course his planning skills.

So, why am I not overjoyed? I guess it might be the fact that I am not really eager to invite 17 kids (his entire preschool class) with siblings and parents this coming Sunday (or anytime in the near future for that matter). Call me a party-pooper but somehow I just don’t love the idea as much as my son does. Added to which, I know that Jonathan has quite specific expectations for this party and would be very disappointed if not everything turned out as he had planned (and it wouldn’t).

 Which is why I am one of the few people who are quite pleased with the weather report’s forecast of rain for the weekend. Jonathan has already accepted that the party will have to be postponed until next year if it is too unpleasant for a garden party this week (Don’t ask me why he isn’t just postponing it a week or so instead. And don’t you dare mention that possibility to him!).

Hopefully, this will solve my dilemma without my having to squash his plans myself. Maybe we can have a smaller watermelon party (say with one or two other families) instead. In the meantime, I am seriously considering the possibility of getting rid of the TV. Clearly it has a very dangerous influence on this family!

I’ve been having some computer problems (yes, I have had the computer only for about a month, and no, I am not a complete computer moron). For some reason, I could no longer access my CD/DVD drive. It not only refused to work, but the computer just pretended that it didn’t even exist. Today, I finally managed to get it set up properly again.  I am still not sure what was wrong, but setting the system back to an earlier configuration did the trick.

Not only is this good news in general, but it also allowed me to finally take a look at the photo CD that my older son brought home from preschool. Last week, they had their official end-of-year party there, and all the kindergartners (who will start school in September) got these pictures as a souvenir. Looking at the photos was fun, but there was one picture in particular that to me epitomizes what childhood should be like. So I thought I would share this picture with you here:

Mudplay

As you can see, both boys had a blast playing with the mud. The preschool had a special project in which they had a truckful of clay delivered, and then the children worked on building a tentlike structure and a small oven out of it. They loved it!

I am rather sad that time at preschool has run out for my son. It was a great experience for him. They concentrated on fostering the children’s development through individual attention, imaginative play, meaningful experiments, interesting excursions, lots of physical activity and (at least in our case) many, many free arts and crafts activities. No cookie cutter ladybug pictures or rote memorization here.

The preschool’s motto is “Being a child should be fun” and they live by that motto. I feel truly blessed that my sons had the opportunity to attend such a great place.

It’s still more than four months till Christmas. So many of you are probably wondering why I am talking about Christmas presents now. A bit premature, some of you might think. Others probably wonder why I even bother mentioning it. After all, their presents not only have been bought, but are already wrapped and safely stored in a closet. 

Buying Christmas presents divides us. Some rush out at the last minute, others have already socked away the better part of their planned Christmas presents before school lets out for the summer. So where do you come in?

I have to admit to a deplorable tendency for procrastination. However, it is usually worst with unpleasant tasks (like taxes), so I haven’t been too bad as far as Christmas is concerned. No rushing out in the morning on Christmas Eve with a long list of needed gifts here. Though, come to think of it, I have been known to make a quick morning run for wrapping paper, tape or gift tags.  But presents themselves, I am usually done at least a couple days ahead of time (which isn’t too bad for a procrastinator).

But the question remains: What’s best? What are the advantages of buying early or late? Here some points I came up with. 

Why you should buy presents as early as possible

• Buying early gives you the best chance to get good deals

What better opportunity for buying Aunt Hilda (well, actually her poodle) a new purple leather leash or your girlfriend a designer scarf then the going-out-of-business sale at the local pet store or summer clearance at the new boutique. Being on the lookout and buying early really gives you the best chance to get a good deal.

• Starting early gives you plenty of time to look for that very special gift

The business trip to London in March would have been the best opportunity to stop by Harrod’s and get that perfect gift for your Anglophilic sister-in-law. And wouldn’t that nifty crocodile jigsaw puzzle you saw at the zoo last month have been a great gift for your reptile-loving nephew? Rushing out the week before Christmas to look for that one special gift will probably not work as well.   

• By buying early you can avoid disaster and humiliation

If you are one of the Early Birds you won’t be in the situation where you will have to explain to your three-year old how come Santa didn’t manage to get her a Doodlewing Doll (or whatever the year’s most coveted gift is), even though all her friends at preschool got one. Instead, you will have the lovingly wrapped Doll sitting safely in a closet while your friends still spend whole afternoons on an odyssey through the local malls, desperately hoping to avoid disaster.

• Getting gifts throughout the year will help you budget properly

We all know Christmas can be a big drain on our bank accounts. By buying stuff throughout the year, the expense gets spread more evenly, making it easier to budget. No longer will you stand in the mall in December, wishing you hadn’t splurged on that new DVD-player in October so that you wouldn’t have to max out your credit cards now.

• Avoid the crowds

Yep, here comes one of the biggies. I took the boys to a large mall near Orlando on the Saturday before Christmas (shoot me, I was so caught up in the Disney vacation spirit that I didn’t even realize it might be crowded).  It took me almost an hour even to get a parking space, and there was no hope of finding a place to sit down at the food court (great fun with two and five year old boys).
If you are finished with your Christmas shopping in September, you can avoid a trip to the mall the last week before Christmas.  Let’s face it, not everyone enjoys the experience of getting crushed by frustrated people while “Jingle Bells” drones on. And if you do enjoy a trip to the stores right before Christmas, you will be much more relaxed if it is just for look-see and not a necessity.

You may think that buying early is the only thing to do, vut lo and behold, here come some advantages to waiting a bit longer.

Why you should put off buying presents until at least early December

• Changing tastes

This is especially true for children, but can apply to anyone. A four year old who absolutely adores Dora the Explorer in February may no longer feel the same by the time Christmas comes around. What do you do if she now speaks only of getting a Doodlewing doll? Will you explain to her that, sorry, honey, but Santa already had your gift? Or are you going to grind your teeth, put Dora in the basement (or I guess you could try to sell it on Ebay) and get her the Doodlewing? Waiting a bit would have avoided that problem.

• If you buy too early you might have no money left for that perfect gift you discover on December 3

If you have all the shopping done early it might be hard to pass up on other things you see later on. If you just can’t resist you will end up with more gifts than you actually planned on. A common theme in many families (Have you taken a look at the overflowing shelves in the kids’ playroom lately?).

 

• Some people enjoy the frenzy and spontaneity of last minute shopping

Well, if you are one of those, all arguments to the contrary will be wasted. If you love the feeling of rushing through a crowded mall (yes, some do!),  then go right ahead. Far be it from me to spoil your innocent pleasure.

That’s all very fine and good, you say. But what is the best time to buy presents? As you can tell by the above, it really depends on personality and circumstances. However, here my recommendations:

1. If you are on a limited budget or have a hard time staying within your means, getting started early on your Christmas buying might help.
2. If you see something that will be absolutely perfect (or something that is an unbelievably good deal) for someone on your list, go ahead and get it now.
3. Put off buying presents for tastes that are likely to change (especially electronics and children’s toys).
4. Buy early any presents that you know (or fear) will get sold out (Doodlewing anyone?).
5. Do not get every last present before November. That way you still have a chance to take advantage of Christmas sales and can adjust for any last minute wishes.

No matter which is your style, Early Bird or Last Minute Commando, take it easy and enjoy the experience. After all, buying gifts should bring joy not only to the recipient but also be fun for you.